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Camo_BDU Creative Commons License 2018.12.02 0 0 94

I was in a job interview today. The interviewing manager handed me his laptop and said, "I want you to try and sell this to me."

 

So I put the laptop under my arm, walked out of the building, and went home.

 

Eventually he called my mobile and said, "Bring it back here right now!"

 

I said, "$200 and it's yours."*

Motley Fool Creative Commons License 2015.04.02 0 0 93

 

LOL

 

 

An elderly Jewish woman is leaving the garment district to go home from work. Suddenly a man who has been walking towards her, stands in front of her, blocks her path, opens up his raincoat and flashes her. Unruffled she takes a look and remarks, "You call that a lining?"

Előzmény: bibrislonci (90)
bibrislonci Creative Commons License 2015.03.31 0 0 91

where are you ?

Előzmény: tibony (88)
bibrislonci Creative Commons License 2015.03.31 0 0 90

manhatten , minus , very cold , one man opens his coat to a beautiful women , he is naked , she looks at him and says : erre a bunda belesre vagy buszke ? a belest nem tudom leforditani , amugy egy filmben hallottam meg evekkel ezelott , asziszem columbo volt 

bibrislonci Creative Commons License 2015.03.26 0 0 89

new york city  = shit = car ==szar   ....if you want to have a good life

tibony Creative Commons License 2014.10.13 0 0 88

Plamber:"WHERE'S THE DRIP?"

 

Wife;"HE IS IN THE BATHROOM TRYING TO FIX THE LEAK"

matteo14 Creative Commons License 2014.07.25 0 0 87

Egyik kedvenc humoristám

romesz Creative Commons License 2014.02.21 0 0 86

The US Oil Spill

 

Motley Fool Creative Commons License 2014.02.01 0 1 85

A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop.
The surgeon was there, waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike.
The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey, Doc, can I ask you a question?"

The surgeon a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle.

The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take valves out, fix 'em, put 'em back in, and when I finish, it works just like new.

So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing basically the same work?"

The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic...
"Try doing it with the engine running."

romesz Creative Commons License 2014.01.30 0 0 82

vrev Creative Commons License 2013.12.17 0 0 81

van itt nekunk egy kiadvanyunk aminek a fele vicc www.smilenewscouponbook.com ugy latom masolnom kell sajnos a printed editionbol , What do you call Santa's helpers ? subordinate clauses ,, why was Santa's little helper depressed ? he had low ELF esteem,,what do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus ? Claustrophobic,,our grand canyon guide was asked if people ever get too close to the edge and fall over ? some do,he said,I call it natural selection,,es meg 50 masik

Motley Fool Creative Commons License 2013.12.17 0 0 80

Flashplayer kell hozza.

Nincs a tablamon B-)

 

Előzmény: Camo_BDU (79)
Camo_BDU Creative Commons License 2013.12.17 0 0 79
Camo_BDU Creative Commons License 2013.11.30 0 0 78


Camo_BDU Creative Commons License 2013.11.25 0 0 77

 

 


zsivany4 Creative Commons License 2013.09.10 0 0 76

As confused as a baby in a topless bar.  (The baby has the right idea.)

Előzmény: Törölt nick (75)
Törölt nick Creative Commons License 2013.08.30 0 0 75

Előzmény: Camo_BDU (74)
Camo_BDU Creative Commons License 2013.08.27 0 0 74


Camo_BDU Creative Commons License 2013.02.08 0 0 72

Al-Gebra. Ez tetszett! :D

Előzmény: _Boros_Tás._ (71)
_Boros_Tás._ Creative Commons License 2013.02.07 0 0 71

Teacher Arrested At JFK Airport in NYC


NEW YORK — Shortly after midnight today, a man was arrested while trying to board an international flight at JFK airport in New York City while in possession of a ruler, protractor, setsquare, slide rule, log tables, and a calculator.

The 37-year-old man, whom officials declined to identify pending further investigation by the homeland security team, was revealed to be a math teacher in the New York City public school system.

At a press conference this morning, Attorney General Alberto R. Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He is being charged with transporting weapons of math instruction.

“Al-Gebra is a fearsome cult,” Gonzales said. “They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.

They use secret code names like ‘x’ and ‘y’ and refer to themselves as ‘unknowns,’ but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval, with co-ordinates in every country.

They test the limits. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say: ‘There are three sides to every triangle’.”

 

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, “If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes.”

 

Camo_BDU Creative Commons License 2013.02.07 0 0 70

 

XD

Sammat Creative Commons License 2013.01.24 0 0 69

XD milyen csábos a Samsung lady..akarom mondani a Samsung Smart tv :) de mindkettőt hazavinném :)

 

Camo_BDU Creative Commons License 2013.01.07 0 0 68

A drunk was in front of a judge. 

The judge says, "You've been brought here for drinking."

The drunk says "Okay, let's get started."

Camo_BDU Creative Commons License 2012.12.22 0 0 67

 

 

 

:D

Camo_BDU Creative Commons License 2012.12.22 0 0 66

Any_1 Creative Commons License 2012.11.09 0 0 65

Talan automata fegyvere volt.

 

 

Előzmény: Törölt nick (62)
Törölt nick Creative Commons License 2012.11.02 0 0 64

A Liverpool docker went to South Africa for a job. The boss tells him: "Its people like you we want here. Here's a test. There's a revolver, go out and shoot 6 niggers and a rabbit." The docker asks: "Why do I have to shoot the rabbit?" He got the job

 

 

Törölt nick Creative Commons License 2012.11.02 0 0 63

 

Someone just knocked on the door selling raffle tickets for poor black orphans.
I said "Fuck that, with my luck I'd probably win one

 

 

Törölt nick Creative Commons License 2012.11.02 0 0 62

What did the Alabama sherriff call the nigger who had been shot 15 times?
Worst case of suicide he had ever seen.

 

 

romesz Creative Commons License 2012.11.01 0 0 61

Ha kedveled azért, ha nem azért nyomj egy lájkot a Fórumért!