Keresés

Hello!

Néha jön nekem is nigériai levél, a következőt szoktam vele csinálni:
válaszolok, hogy "OK, please send me your phone number, i'll call you!".
/magyarul: ok, küldd el a telefonszámod, felhívlak!/

Aztán jön a válasz, a telefonszám, erre ezt válaszolom: "OK, thank you, i sent your letter and phone mumber to the FBI. Have a nice day in a prison!"

/magyarul: köszi, elküldtem a leveled és a telefonszámod az FBI-nak. Jó időtöltést a börtönben./

Persze nem küldöm el a valóságban, ennyire nem foglalkozom a dologgal, de tréfának jó, talán még meg is ijed picit a mocsok (de ez nem valószínű).
Mindegy, válasz nem szokott jönni :)) és ez a lényeg.

No, itt van nektek egy csemege. ;-)))

Date: Fri, 1 Mar 2002 13:40:25 -0800 (PST)
From: monica johnson
Subject: YOU CAN HELP FOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
To: monicaj115@yahoo.com
MIME-Version: 1.0
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii

ATTN: THE BENEFICIARY

Dear Sir,
Your contact was discretely sourced for among others
with respect to your position as an international
acclaimed personality; and we decided in your favour
as a partner for this business proposal bearing in
mind that you are of an outstanding reputation to
usher you in as the beneficiary.

However, I repose every confidence in you concerning
your status by virtue of its nature as being utterly
confidential and with the believe that you could be
fully trusted to handle this business with the degree
of confidence it deserves.

I am MRS.MONICA JOHNSON,an Audit Manager with the
FEDERAL MINISTRY OF PETROLEUM & NATURAL RESOURCES
under the Contract Tender Committee. My colleagues
and I in the corporation need the services/assistance
of a competent, trustworthy and reputable foreigner or
company into whose account the sum of US $6,000,000M
(Six Million United States Dollars) would be
remitted before the Deregulation of the Oil sector.

This fund originated from a deliberate
over-estimation of contracts that was awarded by the
Ministry to foreign companies for drilling, excavation
and spot lifting of black gold (Crude oil) in Portnovo
located in the tiny Republic of Benin. Since, they are
not members of the Organization of Petroleum Exporting
Country, they requested for our Ministry's (Federal
Ministry of Petroleum & Natural Resources)
assistance.
This fund has been lying unclaimed at the Accounts
Department of the Ministry because it has neither a
beneficiary nor any file with the corporation. It is
within this framework, that we have resolved to usher
you in as the beneficiary of this fund by Legally
subcontracting the entitlement to you or your company
based on agreement with you.

Moreover, the need to contact you or your company is
deemed fit because the contracts were executed by
foreign firms and the money cannot go into indigenous
accounts because the Code of Conduct (COC) of the
Federal Civil Servants here (Nigeria) restrict us to
a certain level of Banking facilities which does not
allow us to operate a Domiciliary account; however,
it is imperative to usher you in as a foreign partner
so as to avoid suspicion from unconcerned quarters and
most importantly, for fear of loosing our jobs.

Meanwhile, the original contractors of these projects
had since collected their supposed payments
accordingly after the commissioning of their works.
Now, we want to remit this over-estimated amount to a
reliable overseas account for our personal use and
for
investments opportunities. All the certificates and
proper documentation to effect the transfer shall be
provided to you for your perusal upon your pledge to
do this business with us. Subsequently, your support
will enable us make applications and lodge claims to
the Ministry's Agencies enabling you to fit in as the
beneficiary for the claims.

Please, be informed that this business is closely
knitted and 100% hitch free and so entails absolute
confidentiality and in case you are not interested to
assist, keep it to yourself. Your quick response upon
your Expression Of Interest (EOI) will enable me stop
further search for a beneficiary. Reply through my
confidential email address:monicajohnson@mail.com for
further briefing on how to commence this transaction.
I look forward to hearing from you soon and your
cooperation would be highly acknowledged.

Yours faithfully
MRS MONICA JOHNSON.

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
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Na, ettől az afrikai telebrazilságtól tuti dobtok 1 hátast - érdemes elolvasni! Izgalom, feszültség, romantika!

DEAR, (csak így - "Kedvesem!" Broáfff.....)

I AM FORTUNATE TO GET YOUR CONTACT THROUGH THE
INTERNET AND I BELEIVE THAT YOU CAN HELP ME IN MY
PRESENT SITUATION.

MY NAME IS DAVID REONARD,I WAS RAISED IN AN OPHANAGE HERE IN THE COTE D'IVOIRE AND I HAVE BEEN ATTENDING AN ENGLISH SCHOOL.AT THE AGE OF 3,I WAS ADOPTED BY A MILLIONAIRE FARMER.HE HAD NO CHILD AND HIS WIFE AN AMERICAN WOMAN DIED TEN YEARS EARLIER.HE TOOK ME AS HIS ONLY CHILD.

ON THE 10TH OF NOVEMBER last YEAR,MY ADOPTED
FATHER(HENRY REONARD) WAS MURDERED BY HIRED
ASSASINS.TWO WEEKS BEFORE HIS DEATH,HIS BEHAVIOUR WAS VERY STRANGE.HE CALLED ME AND TOLD ME THAT HE WAS HAVING SOME PROBLEMS WITH HIS FRIENDS, HE INFORMED ME THAT IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO HIM,THAT I SHOULD GO TO THE BICICI BANK ABIDJAN IN THE COTE D'IVOIRE AND PRESENT MY BIRTH CERTIFICATE AND A BANK CARD WHICH HE CONFIDED TO ME WHERE IT WAS HIDDEN, TO THE BANK MANAGER.HE INFORMED ME THAT HE DEPOSITED THE SUM OF TWENTY-ONE MILLION DOLLARS IN A SUSPENCE ACCOUNT FOR OVERSEAS INVESTMENT,WITH THE BANK.HE TOLD ME THAT HE
HAD ADEQUATELY INFORMED THE BANK THAT I AM HIS ONLY NEXT OF KIN AND THAT IF ANYTHING SHOULD HAPPEN TO HIM THAT THE BANK SHOULD HELP ME TRANSFER THE FUNDS OUT OF AFRICA,TO ANY COUNTRY OF MY CHOICE FOR INVESTMENT. TWO DAYS BEFORE HIS DEATH,WE WERE IN THE FARM AND HE CALLED ME AGAIN AND TOLD ME THAT THE FUNDS IN THE BANK ARE FOR MY FUTURE BUT THAT I MUST USE MY HAND AND FIND
A RELIABLE AND TRUSTWORTHY FELLOW TO WHOSE ACCOUNT I MUST TRANSFER THE FUNDS TO BECAUSE I WILL NOT USE THE MONEY IN AFRICA.HE SAID THAT I MUST GO TO SCHOOL AND THAT I SHOULD NOT RETURN BACK TO THE FARMS. ON THE EARLY HOURS OF THE 10TH OF NOVEMBER,SOME MASKED MEN ABOUT SIX IN NUMBER BROKE INTO OUR HOUSE.THEY SHOT MY ADOPTED FATHER,IT WAS VERY HORRIFYING LOOKING AT HIM DIE.THEY TIED ME WITH ROPES. THEY SEARCHED EVERYWHERE IN THE HOUSE LOOKING FOR SOMETHING,LATER THEY ASKED IF I KNEW WHERE THE MONEY IS?I TOLD THEM THAT I HAD NO IDEA OF WHAT THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT.THEY TOLD ME THAT IF THEY LATER DISCOVER THAT I KNEW SOMETHING,THAT I SHOULD CONSIDER MYSELF DEAD.THEY LEFT.

PRESENTLY,MY LIFE IS TERRIBLY IN DANGER HOWEVER I HAVE GONE TO THE BANK AND HAVE SEEN THE BANK MANAGER.HE HAD ASKED ME TO BRING A LAWYER AND THAT I SHOULD SWEAR AN AFFIDAVIT IN THE COURT AS THE LEGITIMATE OWNER OF THE FUNDS.I MET A HUMANITARIAN LAWYER WHO HAD HELPED ME SWEAR THE AFFIDAVIT. PRESENTLY,THE BANK MANAGER HAVE ASKED ME TO PRESENT AN OVERSEAS ACCOUNT WHERE HE WILL TRANSFER THE FUNDS.

I AM THEREFORE SEEKING YOUR HELP:

I)TO HELP ME USE YOUR ACCOUNT FOR THE TRANSFER OF THE FUNDS.
2)TO HELP ME GET OVER TO YOUR COUNTRY AS TO FURTHER MY EDUCATION.
3)TO HELP ME WISELY INVEST THE FUNDS SINCE I AM ONLY 18 YEARS OLD.

FOR YOUR HELP AND SERVICES,I WILL BE WILLING TO GIVE YOU 20% OF THE TOTAL AMOUNT.SINCE PRESENTLY,I AM FINANCIALLY INCAPABLE UNTIL THE FUNDS ARE TRANSFERED,I WILL DEDUCT FROM MY 80% ANY EXPENSES YOU MIGHT INCURE IN THE PROCESS OF HELPING ME TO TRANSFER THE FUNDS AND GET OVER TO YOUR COUNTRY.

PLEASE HELP ME IMMEDIATELY BECAUSE THESE TERRORIST
THAT MURDERED MY ADOPTED FATHER ARE ALREADY AFTER ME.I MUST LEAVE THIS COUNTRY NOW.

I HAVE HANDED EVERYTHING TO THE HAND OF THE
LAWYER.

YOU SHOULD CONTANT ME ON MY DIRECT TELEPHONE LINE FOR MORE DETAILS ALSO TO FORWARD THE LAWYER CONTACT TO YOU. +225 07 99 64 55

REGARDS,

DAVID REONARD

>Die, cocksucker.

Kedves HKoala!
Köszönöm a tanácsot, de - mint legalul mondtam - ezek a levelek csupán szánalmas és nevetséges átverési kísérletek, és még annyira sem szabad komolyan venni őket, hogy a pénzmosás gyanúja egyáltalán felmerüljön.

Vegyünk még egy szép példányt:

From McDonald Eze
Auditing And Accounting Unit
FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPT.
Organization Union du Banque Cotonou-Benin. TEL:00229080465

Dear Sir,

I am McDonald Eze, the director in charge of auditing and accounting section of Union Beninian du Banque Cotonou-Republic Of Benin in West Africa with due respect and regard.
I have decided to contact you on a business
transaction that will be very beneficial to both of us at the end of the transaction. During our investigation and auditing in this bank, my department came across a very huge sum of money belonging to a deceased person who died on november 1997 in a plane crash and the fund has been dormant in his account with this Bank without any claim of the fund in our custody either from his family or relation before our discovery to this development. Although personally, I keep this information secret within myself and partners to enable the whole plans and idea be profitable and successful during the time of execution. The said amount was us$25M (Twenty Five million united states dollars). As it may interest you to know, I got your impressive information through the business directory at chamber of commerce and Industry here in Cotonou-Republic Of Benin where I was searching for a good reliable contact to do the business with.I was elated the time I saw your
address to propose the business to you. Meanwhile all the whole arrangement to put claim
over this fund as the bonafide next of kin to the
deceased,get the required approval and transfer this money to a foreign account has been put in place and directives and needed information will be relayed to you as soon as you indicate your interest and willingness to assist us and also benefit your self to this great business opportunity. In fact I could have done this deal alone but because of my position in this country as a civil servant,we are not allowed to operate a foreign account and would eventually raise an eye brow on my side during the time of transfer because I work in this bank. This is the actual reason why it will require a second party or fellow who will forward claims as the next of kin
with affidavit of trust of oath to the Bank and also present a foreign account where he will need the money to be re-transferred into on his request as it may be after due verification and clarification by the correspondent branch of the bank,where the whole money will be remitted from to your own designated bank account. I will not fail to inform you that this transaction is 100% risk free. On smooth conclusion of this transaction, you will be entitled to 30% of the total sum as gratification,while 10% will be set aside to take care of expenses that may arise during the time of transfer and also telephone bills,while 60% will be for me and my partners. Please,you have been adviced to keep top secret as we are still in service and intend to retire from service after we conclude this deal with you. I will be monitoring the whole situation here in this bank until you confirm the money in your account. and ask us to come down to your country for subsequent sharing of the fund according to percentages previously indicated and further investment, either in your country or any country you advice us to invest in. All other necessary information will be sent to you when I hear from you. I suggest you get back to me as soon as possible stating your wish in this deal.My telephone number is 00229080465.

Best Regard,
McDonald Eze

>Dear Mr McDonald

I deeply regret that I find all McDonald products disgusting, including the new McEze.

Regards,

Director

sürgősen jelölj ki rendőrségi kapcsolattartót (pénzmosás elleni törvény)

Ezzel nagyon kegyetlenül akartam elbánni:From:

Mrs. Patience Saro Wiwa.
Ogoni Tribe Nigeria,

ATTN: REQUEST FOR MUTUAL BUSINESS ASSISTANCE.

My name is Mrs. Patience K. Saro Wiwa, I hail from
Ogoni, a minority but an oil rich tribe of the
eastern Nigeria (west Africa). You may have been aware that my husband, Mr. Ken Saro Wiwa, renowned poet was recently hanged among eight others, by the tyrannical military led government of Nigeria. Their offence lied only on their resolve to fight without arms, for the right of the ogoni people whose land and natural resources have been subjected to untold pollution and other serious environmental degradations as a result of oil-drilling activities by the oil companies.

Government refused to pay any meaningful financial
compensation to the people of ogoni hence the armless struggle by my late husband and his elite compatriots leading to their cruel demise. The attorney to my late husband called a fortnight ago and intimated me that some money is due from an association of oil companies to my late husband, in the sum of twenty-nine million,united state dollars (US$29M). He has also suggested that I should make an arrangement for a bank account out side Nigeria where this money will be transferred. This is to avoid any possibility confiscation by the ravaged, thirsty government of Nigeria. This where I solicit for your assistance.

I shall be please to give you 10% of the total sum if you would offer me your bank account for this purpose, 20% of it will be donated to some organization as my late husband has willed, while my children and I would utilize the rest to continue our life out side Nigeria.

Please be kind hearted enough to contact me back And send to him the following details:
A.The appropriate bank account number to be used.
B.Suitable communication lines (where he could reach you for easier communication).

Yours in need,
Mrs. P. Ken Saro Wiwa.

>Dear Mrs Patricia Ken Saro Wiwa

thank you for writing me in your hour of need. Indeed, I am in need of an African partner for my new business plan. You know that Hollywood is undergoing a new era of re-makes. We have decided with my partner to make a re-make movie of "Tarzan, king of the Jungle" from the Fifties. Currently, I have been doing the casting but wasn't able to find somebody ugly enough for the role of Cheetah. I admit that cost-saving aspects are a priority, and we would be glad to have an actor for this role for whom no make-up is required.

Please indicate your favourite kind of bananas as well so that we can prepare a fitting welcome dinner for you.

In the meantime, may I kindly ask you if you desire to take part in our X-rated movie "Big Black Block Gang Bang From Behind" as well. If you have any questions or other business proposals, please don't hesitate to contact my partner at medgyessy@maszop.hu.

Kind regards,

Director

Kösz, legalább nem kell itt magyarázni, hogy miről van szó. Az irodalmi levelezésemet a továbbiakban is közzé fogom tenni, téma: "A modern idegen nyelvű nyugat-afrikai irodalom a cyberkorban"

Ezt is nagyon szeretem:

STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL

ATTN :SIR,

I AM THE MANAGER BILL AND EXCHANGE OF THE FOREIGN
REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT OF
BANQUE TOGOLAISE DE DEVELOPPEMENT.

I am writing, following the impressive information about your profile through the website , Your capability and reliability to champion this
opportunity. In my department, we discovered an abandoned sum of 14 million US dollars (Fourteen million US dollars). In an account that belongs to one of our foreign customers who died along with his
entire family in September,1997 in a plane crash. Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his next of Kin to come over and claim his money because we can not release it unless somebody applies for it as next of Kin or relation to the
deceased as indicated in our banking and financial policies but unfortunately we learnt that his supposed next of kin or relation died along side with him in the accident leaving no body behind to claim the money.It is therefore upon this discovery that I and other
officials in my department now decided to make this business proposal to you and release the money to you as the next of kin or relation to the deceased for safety and subsequent disbursement since nobody is
coming for it and we dont want this money to go into the Bank treasury as unclaimed bills. The Banking law and guideline here stipulates that if such money remained unclaimed after four years, the money will be
transferred Into the Bank treasury as unclaimed fund. The request for a foreigner as next of kin in this business is occasioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner and an indigene cannot stand as next
of kin to the deceased family. We agreed that 20% of this
money will be for you as foreign partner, in respect to the provision of a foreign account, 5% will be set aside for expenses incurred during this transaction and 75 % would be for me and my colleagues. There
after I and my colleagues will visit your country ! for
disbursement according to the percentages indicated. Therefore to enable the immediate transfer of this fund to you as arranged, you must apply first to the Bank as relation or next of kin of the deceased
indicating your private, telephone and fax number for easy and effective communication and location where the money will be remitted. Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or e-mail the text of
the application. I will not fail to bring to your notice that this transaction is hitch free and that you should not entertain any atom of fear as all required arrangements have been made for the transfer.
You should contact me on MY E-MAIL, as soon as you receive this letter. I decided to contact you as you have products of interest in your part of the world where we can invest our own percentage to avoid
peoples awareness as we are civil servants. We can conclude this operation within ten banking days.Please keep this very confidential. Contact me for more information, all confirmable before you apply if you
want ! .
May God be with you.
Trusting to hear from you shortly for a detailed information which are confirmable before you can make up your mind to apply.

Yours faithfully,

Mr FAVOITE SULEMAN.

>Dear Mr Suleman
I think I know of an opportunity to make good money. All I need is 20 tons of pink ivory to be shipped not later than 10 banking days. This is the chance of your life so please take it VERY seriously. Perhaps it shall be also possible to sell purple rhino horns as well but pink
is the preferred color. I also have a Belgian partner who is interested in purchasing 200 pieces of little girls as Belgiam law stipulates the ownership of such girls is feasible for a meager consideration due to respective authorities.

Regards,

Director

Hát ez Qrva jó:DDDDDDDD
Fél óráig röhögtem a válaszodon!
Nem semmi...
Én is hallottam már ezekről a levelekről, a bátyám egyszer rendes levélben kapott egy ehhez hasonló küldeményt. Persze mondtam neki, hogy dobja ki a kukába és felejtse el.
Kíváncsi lennék Mr. Amadi arcára(ha egyáltalán létezik), amikor elolvasta a választ:)
üdv: evibly

Na, akkor miután valaki végre lenullázott (köszi!), jöhet az első fecske (afrikai, ugye!).

From Daniel Amadi Auditing And Accounting Unit FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPT. Organization Union du Banque Cotonou,Republic Of Benin. REL:00229-080465

Dear Sir, I am Daniel Amadi, the director in charge ofauditing and accounting section of Union Beninian du Banque Cotonou-Republic Of Benin in West Africa with duerespect and regard.
I have decided to contact you on a business transaction that will be very beneficial to both of
us at the end of the transaction. During our investigation and auditing in this bank, my department came across a very huge sum of money
belonging to a deceased person who died on november
1997 in a plane crash and the fund has been dormant in
his account with this Bank without any claim of the
fund in our custody either from his family or relation
before our discovery to this development.
Although personally,I keep this information secret
within myself and partners to enable the whole plans
and idea be profitable and successful during the time
of execution. The said amount was us$25M (Twenty Five
million united states dollars). As it may interest you to know, I got your
impressive information through the business directory at chamber
of commerce and Industry here in Cotonou- Benin whereI
was searching for a good reliable contact to do the
business with.I was elated the time I saw your address
to propose the business to you.
Meanwhile all the whole arrangement to put claim over
this fund as the bonafide next of kin to the
deceased,get the required approval and transfer this
money to a foreign account has been put in place and
directives and needed information will be relayed to
you as soon as you indicate your interest and
willingness to assist us and also benefit your self to
this great business opportunity. In fact I could have done this deal alone but
because of my position in this country as a civil servant,we
are not allowed to operate a foreign account and would
eventually raise an eye brow on my side during the
time of transfer because I work in this bank. This is
the actual reason why it will require a second party
or fellow who will forward claims as the next of kin
with affidavit of trust of oath to the Bank and also
present a foreign account where he will need the money
to be re-transferred into on his request as it may be
after due verification and clarification by the
correspondent branch of the bank,where the whole money
will be remitted from to your own designated bank account.
I will not fail to inform you that this transaction is 100% risk free.
On smooth conclusion of this transaction, you will be
entitled to 30% of the total sum as
gratification,while 10% will be set aside to take care
of expenses that may arise during the time of transfer and also
telephone bills,while 60% will be for me and my partners.
Please,you have been adviced to keep top secret as we
are still in service and intend to retire from service
after we conclude this deal with you.
I will be monitoring the whole situation here in this
bank until you confirm the money in your account. and
ask us to come down to your country for subsequent
sharing of the fund according to percentages
previously indicated and further investment, either in
your country or any country you advice us to invest in.
All other necessary information will be sent to you when I hear from you.
I suggest you get back to me as soon as possible
stating your wish in this deal.My telephone number is 00229-080465.
Best Regard, Mr Daniel Amadi.
----

>Dear Mr Amadi
Unfortunately I am not in the position to help you but if you have ever desired to act in animal hardcore porn movies, please contact my partner at (:-))@index.hu. Have a nice day,

Director, www.horrible.org

:)))))
Alig vár0m!

Egy rosszakaróm megfelelő helyre elküldte az e-mailcímemet, és azóta folyamatosan üzleti ajánlatokat kapok egzotikus afrikai országok egzotikus beozstású tisztviselőitől. A lényeg mindig ugyanaz: dollármilliókat akarnak kicsempészni az országból, ehhez szükségük van egy külföldi bankszámlára, és ha megadom a bankszámla- és telefonszámomat, átutalják a pénzt, aminek tíz-tizenöt-húsz százaléka az enyém lehet. Hö, kiráj biznic.
A leveleket annyira mulatságosan primitívnek találom, hogy közzéteszem őket a Törzsasztalon, hozzácsapva a rájuk adott válaszaimat is. Jó szórakozást... és nehogy valaki bevegye a csalit.